Doesn’t anybody do customer research any more? Wouldn’t it be a better idea to find out how your customers are going to react before you implement a toxic new policy? B of A and Verizon wanted to charge customers for using a debit card and paying a bill online; since those policies subsequently were reversed they’re fiscally in the same place as before but with bad press and a lot of pissed-off customers. Netflix soldiered on with its plan to separate its DVD delivery and streaming content, but paid a terrible price in subscribers and market value. How is any of this a benefit to the shareholders?

I guess it’s good news that the cycle of mea culpa is getting shorter, as noted above. But meanwhile I’ve noticed a couple of new assaults on my wallet from smaller companies and wonder if it’s part of a larger trend to put short term revenues ahead of longer term customer loyalty and common sense.

I previously wrote about Boingo and their “good news” that I could now download an updated version of their wireless roaming app that allowed me to use just two devices in my account rather than have unlimited access. I cancelled, but then I recently found myself in the BWI airport needing wireless access and was tempted by an offer to get a $25 American Express gift card after 2 months of service. So I re-upped, after discovering out something interesting: of the three different devices I was carrying, each received a different offer when I went to boingo.com. My laptop (where I’d received the email) told me I could join for $9.95 a month and made no mention of the gift card. My tablet offered the gift card and $9.95 a month. My Android had the gift card for the rate of $7.95 a month so that’s how I joined. But I don’t need a wireless service on my cell phone since it has an unlimited data plan so I went through the process of registering my laptop and tablet and was told oops, I’ve reached my 2 device limit.

Turns out the very act of signing up had registered the cell as one of my two devices and now my only option is to cancel it, effective at the end of the billing period one month hence. So I’m down to one device during this period and then can register my second device. Just way too much clunkiness for customer satisfaction and what makes it all more irritating is that Boingo has this breezy website where a message “oops… something has gone wrong” that pops up way too often and only serves to increase my irritation with that man behind the curtain.

A more disturbing revenue tactic was applied by Bill Me Later after I tried to take advantage of an offer for $15 off when I paid for an eBay transaction through their service. I was told online that, for unspecified reasons, they were unable to process my payment so fine, I paid through Paypal. I then started to get daily voicemails from somebody who left a message saying “This is the fraud department at ramamafoqw calling about a recent transaction…” They didn’t exactly say ramamafoqw but they did mumble the company name. After several calls I realized they were saying “Bill Me Later.” I called the number and got a message “we’re sorry, no one is available.” Finally their representative reached me live and it turned out the purpose of this “fraud alert” was to set up an account, but not offer me the $15 credit since that one had expired.

So that’s downright deceptive… using the fraud alert concept, which has struck terror into the heart of every consumer at one time or another, to make the customer pay attention so you can sell them a service. (And how did they get my number? Well, turns out Bill Me Later is owned by Paypal…) What this has in common with Boingo, and also the three giant companies mentioned above, is that nobody applied the sniff test. As in, “this will hopefully make us some money but is it going to make our customers more loyal and satisfied, or less?” If that question is no longer relevant, then it’s going to be a long year.

P.S. Reading over this post, my experiences do sound a bit down in the weeds and yes I do have better things to do than chasing after $25 gift cards. But these are the hooks marketers use to get customers and prospects involved, and if they don’t provide a satisfactory customer experience or are perceived as deceptive then sales will suffer and more than likely we in the marketing department will get the blame.

But why would a company even want to banter with the customer in the first place? This is not a marriage or personal relationship where you are trying to gain the upper hand. There’s a customer service policy in place to handle whatever concern the customer is contacting you about. Just deal with it, as efficiently is possible. Don’t embellish the dialog in a way that can turn a neutral situation into a negative.

At the other end of the spectrum, if the customer has a complaint or request and your policy is to honor it, there is nothing wrong with an additional coating of obsequiousness. An example is this response from amazon.com when I downloaded a Kindle book thinking it was free through the Prime lending library and discovered I was charged for it.

First, let me apologize for any inconvenience caused by this issue. I do understand how frustrating this must have been to you. We value our customers’ trust above all else–it is the foundation upon which Amazon.com was built. Please know that this situation was the result of a combination of technical and human errors, and that in no way did we intend for this to happen.

Over the top? You bet. Did it cost Amazon any more than a simple notice that my charge had been reversed? Not a penny. Will this make me more likely to give more money to Amazon? Absolutely.

When I got home there was an email, as opposed to the more urgent phone call you might expect. There was a number for me to call. I did… and was put on hold. WTF! I then had a conversation with an overseas CSR. I am not one of the “keep it in America” folks by kneejerk reaction, but in this case the language barrier might have kept her from realizing some of the script she was reading from was of a toxic nature.

I see you are calling from a number in your profile, you had a charge that was rejected because of our fraud prevention alerts. I asked why, since Cost Plus is a recognized national retailer. First surprise in her scripted answer: the larger the organization, the greater for the potential for fraud. Oh, says I, are you saying I should only shop at small stores from now on? Her response: I can see you were embarrassed sir, when your card was rejected. (WTF! I never said that!) I can understand that because of the prestige attached to the American Express card. (Yes, I’m a desperate striver who was accidentally approved for this card. Now my dirty laundry is out in public.)

I could have been reassured by this conversation, but instead I’m in doubt about my choice of shopping destinations and my worthiness to carry the card… which you can’t bet I won’t be doing much longer. Well, that’s not actually true because I have points to redeem. But you can bet this puppy is going to stay in my pocket the balance of this holiday shopping season. Don’t have time for this shit.

“A customer is the most important visitor on our premises. he is not dependent on us. We are dependent on him. He is not an interruption in our work. He is the purpose of it. He is not an outsider in our business. He is part of it. We are not doing him a favor by serving him. He is doing us a favor by giving us an opportunity to do so.”

The quote is attributed to Mahatma Gandhi. Ludicrous. Or is it? A search turns up both corroboration and skepticism. My money is with the denier who reports the quote actually came from Zig Ziglar, who says Gandhi said it.

Gotta love the internets.

I would have liked “apology” which would indicate a price rollback but “explanation” carries no such connotation and indeed regarding the pricing, Hastings informs us “we’re done with that!” The explanation is of the rationale behind splitting the streaming and DVD-delivery services; the mess-up was in not explaining it properly to consumers, which he now does in the email and more extensively in his own blog.

The streaming video service is now Netflix and the DVDs are about to become “Quikster”, a new orphan brand, suggesting that the “familiar red envelope” is about to become the equivalent of “AOL dial-up”, an analogy Hastings uses in his message though not exactly in that way.

I am fascinated by this turn of events. It’s like that story of the backpacker who cuts off his own arm to escape and save his life. It’s like watching Wil. E. Coyote standing his ground as the roadrunner approaches at full speed. And I am especially fascinated by evidence the decision was not made with full benefit of research and reflection by one of the world’s most recognizable brands. Do a web search for “quickster” and “quikster” (results will be roughly the same) and right now the top two hits are for an Amway-related scandal involving a like-sounding product, and a rather risqué definition on urbandictionary.com. Look up quikster.com on the internet registries and you’ll find the registration changed just a couple of weeks ago and as of this morning quikster.net and quikster.org were still available for purchase, suggesting haste and confusion in the name-changing.

I plan to stay tuned…. Though perhaps not as a Quikster customer.

UPDATE: just a few hours later, those web search results have changed quite a bit… I hope you will take my word as to what they looked like about 7 am Eastern this morning. Also with more reflection, I want to point out a huge failing of Quikster as a brand identity: it does nothing to say what this product or service actually does, other than the fact that it’s fast. I’m guessing that QuickFlix and QuikFlix were taken?

My own Borders was one of the first scheduled for closing, and they’ve been gone for maybe four months. Like a zombie or a hand from the grave, my Borders Rewards membership kept reminding me of new offers which were no longer relevant until finally I clicked the CAN-SPAM link and killed it.

But today the corpse is risen anew. Some special set of rules allows the liquidators to send my email address a message that says:

Your WOWPoints will be honored. They will be moved to OO.com over the next 30 days. Once there, you can use them just as you do now.

Um, no. I had a relationship with Borders, but I am not interested in you new guys whoever you are. Why is it so difficult to take a national brand with huge loyalty and do something for the customers which is also profitable when things go bad?

Just askin….

This increase is not for traditional Netflix subscribers who get a disk in the mail; it’s for the potentially far greater universe of prospects who came in via streaming. I signed up for streaming Netflix after my family got a Roku last holiday season. We quickly discovered that the “20,000 streaming movies” was actually not that big a number when looking for a specific title so we added the option of getting a disk when we can’t get instant satisfaction for $2 more a month. Nothing about our behavior, therefore, suggests we will be good candidates for conversion to a standard $7.99 a month disk in the mail plan (that’s the basis of the cost increase) and we are indeed cancelling our non-streaming subscription.

But meanwhile, Netflix is paring its streaming offerings presumably so it can get more disk orders. I know this because my teenager wanted to watch Zombieland for the umpteenth time last night and it’s gone! Not fair, Netflix! This is the company that always contacts me to ask about the video quality of the streaming show I watched or the delivery date of my DVD and a back door change in our agreement definitely doesn’t cut it. It feels like Netflix has made a corporate decision to move away from streaming and toward DVD delivery when everything we read about broadband consumption patterns should point them in the opposite direction.

Maybe, with negotiations going on behind the scenes with entertainment content providers, the streaming model isn’t making sense financially with unlimited viewings for one price. I would be willing to pay a small upcharge (NOT the full cost of renting a single DVD in the mall) for streaming access to new releases. I would also consider a “premium” level (let’s say $12.99 a month which is $5 more than the current streaming plan) for unlimited access for many more titles. But please, Netflix, don’t ask me to change my viewing habits to accommodate your new business model… even if it’s the old business model for many of your customers. I don’t think I’m alone in this. When I want to see it, I want it now… waiting for a disk in the mail seems forever.

Email from PC Connection Express

I’ve spent many a dollar over the years with PC Connection so when I got an email today offering great prices on an Adobe Creative Suite upgrade from “PC Connection Express” I was curious. Is this somebody hijacking the brand? If not, how can I take advantage of the savings… upgrades “starting at $289″ for a product with a retail well over $1000?

Where's the offer? Where's the price?

Why should I have to choose? You do it for me.

Sad thing is, I probably do want to buy this upgrade. I just purchased a new laptop from these guys within the past 90 days with no problem. Hope their fulfillment is in better shape than their marketing department.

Good software user design includes an escape hatch as well. A good example is the TurboTax desktop product, which gives you an always-accessible choice of “Forms” or “EasyStep” so you can look at your current information in the way that makes most sense for you.

But I’m using TurboTax Online for the first time, and they don’t do that. The ONLY way to navigate is to follow the prompts on the screen, and if the prompts don’t work and you ask for help then Intuit twists itself into contortions trying to answer your question. (I’m talking about the in-program help, not the too-broad User Community sidebar.)

So, I want to import the return created with TurboTax Desktop 2009. I find a help screen with instructions which I’ll paste below (and cut out some info that is not pertinent):

Transfer Last Year’s Tax Info from Desktop to Online
Updated: 11/29/2010 Article ID: GEN12156
Below is the procedure for transferring (or uploading) a tax return created in 2009 TurboTax Desktop software to TurboTax Online 2010.
Follow these steps to transfer:
1. Sign in to TurboTax Online (or click the Create an Account or Try It First buttons).
2. Once you’re in TurboTax Online, click the Home tab and then select the first link in the lower half of the screen, titled Transfer last year’s TurboTax return from your computer.*
3. On the Transfer Last Year’s TurboTax Return screen, click Browse, and then select your 2009 tax data file. (Find last year’s tax file on Windows or Macintosh)
4. Click Transfer Return.
5. Once you see the message Transfer Complete, click Continue to start your 2010 return.

I assume you didn’t read all that, but I had to. I started from the top and followed the instructions to clear my 2010 return that I had started by accident. I looked for the link which they told me very clearly would be “Transfer last year’s return from your computer” but I saw no such link; instead I saw “we can help you transfer last year’s computer return from your computer”. Clicking that just resets the page I just reset, taking me nowhere.

Finally I notice the asterisk, and track down to the footnote at the bottom. It tells me:

* If you don’t see the Transfer last year’s TurboTax return link, it’s because you:
• Previously entered information in your 2010 TurboTax Online return; or
• Already transferred your 2009 data, either by uploading last year’s tax data file or by signing in with your 2009 TurboTax Online login.
Unless you signed in using your 2009 TurboTax Online login, you can click the Clear your 2010 return and start over link on the Home tab, and then resume at Step 2 above. Clearing your return removes all tax data from your return, so make sure you really want to do this.
However, if you signed in using your 2009 login, clearing your return automatically re-transfers your 2009 online data, making it impossible to transfer your desktop tax file. The only solution in this case is to create a new account in TurboTax Online 2010 so you can start with a clear return. [underlining mine.]

Again, I assume you didn’t read that so here is what is going on. IF you created a login last year, THEN you can’t transfer in a desktop return because TurboTax assumes you already have a return online. But I don’t because I created the return with their desktop product, then created a login for e-filing. It’s a Catch-22 which Intuit recognizes, hence their outrageous solution that I have to forget my old username and password and start anew.

This should never have seen the light of day. Whereas most companies urge you to set up an account and save your user name for a better experience, Intuit tells me the only option to get out of this problem is to forget I have a user name and start over with a brand new account. Boo, hiss. That’s what the lack of an escape hatch will do to you.

When I checked out I half-heard someone else complaining about an illegitimate charge on their bill. I couldn’t get my own bill because the printer was broken and they promised to email it to me. When I received the email I saw my own illegitimate charge, a daily fee for a safe I didn’t know was in the room.

I emailed the general manager (who had sent me the invoice) asking for a correction. Nearly a week later I’ve heard nothing. After a few days I went on the website of the parent organization, Choice Hotels International, and filled out a tedious form asking for help. Though they say “we appreciate that you took the time to bring these matters to our attention” and promise a response within 72 hours, nothing from them either.

Isn’t this a great example of terrible customer service? There’s no excuse for the invoice trickery to begin with, but if it was unintentional the management should have corrected it and apologized immediately. And I’m now seeing that there is nobody behind the curtain at Choice International, a somewhat toothless affinity organization since all their hotels are independently owned.

A lost customer to this establishment and more than likely any other hotel in the chain… plus nasty whiny blog posts and tweets… seem like a poor trade off for somebody’s desire to stuff a couple of extra bucks in their pocket. Bad choice, Quality Suites John Wayne Airport and Choice International.